Handey

As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red again, I sat there thinking about life. Was it nothing more than a bunch of honking and yelling? Sometimes it seemed that way.

Jack Handey

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Handey

Frank knew that no man had ever crossed the desert on foot and lived to tell about it. So, he decided to get back in his car and keep driving.

Jack Handey


Handey

A lot of times when you first start out on a project you think, This is never going to be finished. But then it is, and you think, Wow, it wasn’t even worth it.

-Jack Handey


Daily Handey

Here’s a good thing to do if you go to a party and you don’t know anybody: First, take out the garbage. Then go around and collect any extra garbage that people might have, like a crumpled-up napkin, and take that out too. Pretty soon people will want to meet the busy garbage guy.

Jack Handey